Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime.

Quote by Red Skelton

Topics: Red Skelton Quotes

If by chance some day you're not feeling well and you should remember some silly...

If by chance some day you're not feeling well and you should remember some silly...

Exercise? I get it on the golf course. When I see my friends collapse, I...

Exercise? I get it on the golf course. When I see my friends collapse, I...

I personally believe we were put here to build and not to destroy.

I personally believe we were put here to build and not to destroy.

Congress: Bingo with billions.

Congress: Bingo with billions.

Congress: Bingo with billions

Congress: Bingo with billions

I'm nuts and I know it. But so long as I make 'em laugh, they...

I'm nuts and I know it. But so long as I make 'em laugh, they...

Live by this credo: have a little laugh at life and look around you for...

Live by this credo: have a little laugh at life and look around you for...

I left home because I was hungry.

I left home because I was hungry.

His death was the first time that Ed Wynn ever made anyone sad.

His death was the first time that Ed Wynn ever made anyone sad.

No matter what your heartache may be, laughing helps you forget it for a few...

No matter what your heartache may be, laughing helps you forget it for a few...

God's children and their happiness are my reasons for being.

God's children and their happiness are my reasons for being.

All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner.

All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner.

Our principles are the springs of our actions. Our actions, the springs of our happiness...

Our principles are the springs of our actions. Our actions, the springs of our happiness...

Men of thoughts should have nothing to do with action

Men of thoughts should have nothing to do with action

Saying that positive thinking usually doesnt work is such heresy that I may be unceremoniously...

Saying that positive thinking usually doesnt work is such heresy that I may be unceremoniously...

All that we are is the result of what we have thought. If a man...

All that we are is the result of what we have thought. If a man...

The greatest happiness of the greatest number is the foundation of morals and legislation

The greatest happiness of the greatest number is the foundation of morals and legislation

You can usually tell when I'm happy by the fact that I've put on weight.

You can usually tell when I'm happy by the fact that I've put on weight.

Happiness is a continuation of happenings which are not resisted.

Happiness is a continuation of happenings which are not resisted.

It is only a poor sort of happiness that could ever come by caring very...

It is only a poor sort of happiness that could ever come by caring very...