Alcohol is the cause and the solution to many of life's problems.

Quote by Dan Castellaneta

Topics: Drinking Quotes, Humor Quotes, Solution Quotes

I know what you're saying, Bart. When I was young, I wanted an electric football...

I know what you're saying, Bart. When I was young, I wanted an electric football...

Well you know boys, a nuclear reactor is a lot like women. You just have...

Well you know boys, a nuclear reactor is a lot like women. You just have...

I think the tone of the show has certainly changed over the years, because it's...

I think the tone of the show has certainly changed over the years, because it's...

Now, son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for daddies and kids with fake...

Now, son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for daddies and kids with fake...

Alcohol is the cause and the solution to many of life's problems.

Alcohol is the cause and the solution to many of life's problems.

Good drink... good meat... good God, let's eat!

Good drink... good meat... good God, let's eat!

I always enjoyed writing. I did playlets in high school, I did radio shows in...

I always enjoyed writing. I did playlets in high school, I did radio shows in...

I won't sleep in the same bed with a woman who thinks I'm lazy! I'm...

I won't sleep in the same bed with a woman who thinks I'm lazy! I'm...

I often say, if I wasn't part of the show I'd be a huge fan...

I often say, if I wasn't part of the show I'd be a huge fan...

I've made a kind of pact with myself where I said, It doesn't matter what...

I've made a kind of pact with myself where I said, It doesn't matter what...

It's hard to find a play that's right for me to do. Rather than waiting...

It's hard to find a play that's right for me to do. Rather than waiting...

Oh, so they have internet on computers now!

Oh, so they have internet on computers now!

It is better to watch things then to do them.

It is better to watch things then to do them.

Press the any key ... hmmm where's the any key?

Press the any key ... hmmm where's the any key?

Oh, so they have internet on computers now!

Oh, so they have internet on computers now!

Son, a woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step...

Son, a woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step...

Don't you ever, EVER talk that way about television.

Don't you ever, EVER talk that way about television.

Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against...

Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against...

Sometimes the only way you can feel good about yourself is by making someone else...

Sometimes the only way you can feel good about yourself is by making someone else...

Go ahead and play the blues if it'll make you happy.

Go ahead and play the blues if it'll make you happy.