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If cats looked like frogs we'd realize what nasty, cruel little bastards they are. Style....

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If cats looked like frogs we'd realize what nasty, cruel little bastards they are. Style....

Time spent with cats is never wasted

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Time spent with cats is never wasted

In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this.

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In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this.

All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.

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All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.

“Begin at the beginning," the King said, very gravely, "and go on till you come...

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“Begin at the beginning,

Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.

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Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.

Some people say, “Never let them see you cry.” I say, if you’re so mad...

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Some people say, “Never let them see you cry.” I say, if you’re so mad...

I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I...

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I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I...

You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.

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You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.

Say 'provoking' again. Your mouth looks provocative when you do.

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Say 'provoking' again. Your mouth looks provocative when you do.

'I am' is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that...

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'I am' is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that...

Ever notice how 'What the hell' is always the right answer?

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Ever notice how 'What the hell' is always the right answer?

I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.

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I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.

Reality continues to ruin my life

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Reality continues to ruin my life

When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A...

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When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A...

Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But...

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Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But...

Go to heaven for the climate and hell for the company

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Go to heaven for the climate and hell for the company

Time is a drug. Too much of it kills you.

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Time is a drug. Too much of it kills you.

I wrote the story myself. It's about a girl who lost her reputation and never...

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I wrote the story myself. It's about a girl who lost her reputation and never...

Only a true best friend can protect you from your immortal enemies.

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Only a true best friend can protect you from your immortal enemies.

Only men who are not interested in women are interested in women's clothes. Men who...

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Only men who are not interested in women are interested in women's clothes. Men who...