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If a woman is upset, hold her and tell her how beautiful she is. If...

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If a woman is upset, hold her and tell her how beautiful she is. If...

A fool always finds one more fool to admire him

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A fool always finds one more fool to admire him

Women react differently a French woman who sees herself betrayed by her husband will kill...

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Women react differently a French woman who sees herself betrayed by her husband will kill...

Young men want to be faithful, and are not; old men want to be faithless,...

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Young men want to be faithful, and are not; old men want to be faithless,...

I never make the same mistake twice. I make it five or six times, just...

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I never make the same mistake twice. I make it five or six times, just...

She ain't heavy cause she's in my heart already

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She ain't heavy cause she's in my heart already

Laughing at your own mistake can lengthen your life. Laughing at your wife’s mistakes can...

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Laughing at your own mistake can lengthen your life. Laughing at your wife’s mistakes can...

A jealous woman does better research that the FBI.

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A jealous woman does better research that the FBI.

Sex is like math. Add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and hope...

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Sex is like math. Add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and hope...

The reason people use crucifix against vampires is that vampires are allergic to bullshit.

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The reason people use crucifix against vampires is that vampires are allergic to bullshit.

Would you like some aloe vera? You just got burned!

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Would you like some aloe vera? You just got burned!

Ahh, a little cancer never hurt anybody. Everybody needs a little cancer I think. It's...

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Ahh, a little cancer never hurt anybody. Everybody needs a little cancer I think. It's...

New Year's Day is every man's birthday.

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New Year's Day is every man's birthday.

If women ruled the world there would be no wars. Just a bunch of jealous...

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If women ruled the world there would be no wars. Just a bunch of jealous...

Every guy thinks every girl's dream is to find the perfect guy.. pshh, every girl's...

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Every guy thinks every girl's dream is to find the perfect guy.. pshh, every girl's...

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak.

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Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak.

I don't care what people think of me. At least mosquitos find me attractive.

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I don't care what people think of me. At least mosquitos find me attractive.

A lie is just a great story that someone ruined with the truth

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A lie is just a great story that someone ruined with the truth

Laugh as much as you breathe and love as long you live

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Laugh as much as you breathe and love as long you live

You can't live your life for other people. You've got to do what's right for...

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You can't live your life for other people. You've got to do what's right for...

I never want to forget any of my memories even the most painful ones, because...

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I never want to forget any of my memories even the most painful ones, because...

It's hard to sleep at night when there's so many thoughts going through your head.

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It's hard to sleep at night when there's so many thoughts going through your head.