My wife wanted me to take her somewhere expensive last night.

My wife wanted me to take her somewhere expensive last night.

Topics: Funny Picture Quotes, Marriage Picture Quotes

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world . I know because I've...

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Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world . I know because I've...

My tremendous intuitive sense of the female creature informs me that you are troubled.

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My tremendous intuitive sense of the female creature informs me that you are troubled.

We are all little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone...

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We are all little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone...

Many people look forward to the new year for a new start on old habits.

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Many people look forward to the new year for a new start on old habits.

Santa Claus has the right idea : visit people only once a year

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Santa Claus has the right idea : visit people only once a year

New Year's Resolutions This year I resolve to be more democratic and I've made a...

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New Year's Resolutions This year I resolve to be more democratic and I've made a...

Golden rule: I do not buy dinner to get yes. Dinner's a very intimate activity....

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Golden rule: I do not buy dinner to get yes. Dinner's a very intimate activity....

Stop thinking of fun and have it

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Stop thinking of fun and have it

When a woman is twenty, a child deforms her; when she is thirty, he preserves...

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When a woman is twenty, a child deforms her; when she is thirty, he preserves...

By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll be happy. if you...

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By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll be happy. if you...

Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.

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Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.

A lot of times when a package says 'Open other end', I purposely open the...

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A lot of times when a package says 'Open other end', I purposely open the...

Galaxy's centre tastes of raspberries and smells of rum, say astronomers.

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Galaxy's centre tastes of raspberries and smells of rum, say astronomers.

House: No, I hired you because you look good; it's like having a nice piece...

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House: No, I hired you because you look good; it's like having a nice piece...

Every guy thinks every girl's dream is to find the perfect guy.. pshh, every girl's...

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Every guy thinks every girl's dream is to find the perfect guy.. pshh, every girl's...

Love is a blind whore with mental disease and no sense of humor

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Love is a blind whore with mental disease and no sense of humor

It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I...

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It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I...

Be happy in front of people who don't like you, 'It kills them'

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Be happy in front of people who don't like you, 'It kills them'