Every time I try to read the Bible... and Jesus... the one with all the words in red... I open my Bible to that New Testimony and see all that red and I just give up. Jesus was talkin' way…

Topics: Madea Quotes

Cooka big pot of grits, bring him into the kitchen, then toss the grits on...

Cooka big pot of grits, bring him into the kitchen, then toss the grits on...

Wwjd what's that? What's wrong with jermaine dupree?

Wwjd what's that? What's wrong with jermaine dupree?

Faith without works is dead, you can't just sit around praying you got to do...

Faith without works is dead, you can't just sit around praying you got to do...

I'm waiting for Miranda to come in and nobody came in. I was waiting for...

I'm waiting for Miranda to come in and nobody came in. I was waiting for...

Aquanisha baby, when u perm, ur head, perm both sides.

Aquanisha baby, when u perm, ur head, perm both sides.

I'll shove that phone so far down your throat you'll have to call 911 wit'...

I'll shove that phone so far down your throat you'll have to call 911 wit'...

Hellerrr How u durnin'

Hellerrr How u durnin'

Now I'm gonna tell you this one time for the Father, once for the Son,...

Now I'm gonna tell you this one time for the Father, once for the Son,...

Brown, stop shoppin at baby gap!

Brown, stop shoppin at baby gap!

The devil is a lie, im not finna eat this.

The devil is a lie, im not finna eat this.

Aint no body said nothin bout no lunrch, I don't want no lurnch.

Aint no body said nothin bout no lunrch, I don't want no lurnch.

I tried to read that New Testamonial with the red letters, but Jesus be talkin...

I tried to read that New Testamonial with the red letters, but Jesus be talkin...

I keeps me a piece of steel [pulls out gun] load your steel thank ya...

I keeps me a piece of steel [pulls out gun] load your steel thank ya...

Sweetheart, that word has 2 r's in it. It, COSMERTOLERGY!!!

Sweetheart, that word has 2 r's in it. It, COSMERTOLERGY!!!

Lil girl! Stop poppin dat gum!

Lil girl! Stop poppin dat gum!

A grown man takes care of his child without anybody needing to tell him he...

A grown man takes care of his child without anybody needing to tell him he...

I'm Madea. Muh to da damn D-E-A!

I'm Madea. Muh to da damn D-E-A!

Aint none of my weapons made by concealed they all made by smith and wesson.

Aint none of my weapons made by concealed they all made by smith and wesson.

You ain't even gotta say nothin' I done changed my life. I am livin' for...

You ain't even gotta say nothin' I done changed my life. I am livin' for...

Lord help me Jesus, I'm bout to run my car right through K-mart!

Lord help me Jesus, I'm bout to run my car right through K-mart!