People say New Yorkers can't get along. Not true. I saw two New Yorkers, complete strangers, sharing a cab. One guy took the tires and the radio; the other guy took the engine.

Quote by David Letterman

Topics: David Letterman Quotes

Wherever we've travelled in this great land of ours, we've found that people everywhere are...

Wherever we've travelled in this great land of ours, we've found that people everywhere are...

President Bush says he needs a month off to unwind. Unwind? When the hell does...

President Bush says he needs a month off to unwind. Unwind? When the hell does...

Sometimes something worth doing is worth overdoing.

Sometimes something worth doing is worth overdoing.

Congratulations are in order for Woody Allen - he and Soon Yi have a brand...

We have defeated Saddam Hussein and Iraq. The good news is Iraq is ours, and...

We have defeated Saddam Hussein and Iraq. The good news is Iraq is ours, and...

Number one: Don't frisk me. Don't hurt me physically. Don't get anywhere near my neck....

Number one: Don't frisk me. Don't hurt me physically. Don't get anywhere near my neck....

President Bush says he needs a month off to unwind. Unwind? When the hell does...

President Bush says he needs a month off to unwind. Unwind? When the hell does...

President Bush has said that he does not need approval from the UN to wage...

President Bush has said that he does not need approval from the UN to wage...

Valentine's Day money-saving tip: Break up on February 13th, get back together on the 15th.

Valentine's Day money-saving tip: Break up on February 13th, get back together on the 15th.

The White House is giving George W. Bush intelligence briefings. You know, some of these...

The White House is giving George W. Bush intelligence briefings. You know, some of these...

Iraq's elite Republican Guard is doing so badly they're changing their name to the Democratic...

Iraq's elite Republican Guard is doing so badly they're changing their name to the Democratic...

New York now leads the world's great cities in the number of people around whom...

New York now leads the world's great cities in the number of people around whom...

I'm just trying to make a smudge on the collective unconscious.

I'm just trying to make a smudge on the collective unconscious.

The weather here is gorgeous. It's mild and feels like it's in the eighties. The...

The weather here is gorgeous. It's mild and feels like it's in the eighties. The...

The worst tempered people I have ever met were those who knew that they were...

The worst tempered people I have ever met were those who knew that they were...

I cannot sing, dance or act; what else would I be but a talk show...

I cannot sing, dance or act; what else would I be but a talk show...

It's so warm now, and Thanksgiving came so early - is it just me, or...

It's so warm now, and Thanksgiving came so early - is it just me, or...

It's official, Arnold said he will enter the race for governor. At least that's what...

It's official, Arnold said he will enter the race for governor. At least that's what...

Congratulations are in order for Woody Allen - he and Soon Yi have a brand...

No one knows if Saddam is still alive. They keep showing old footage of him...

No one knows if Saddam is still alive. They keep showing old footage of him...