I decided to cancel my Twitter account. I dont want to sound paranoid, but Im pretty sure people are following me.

Topics: Clever Facebook Status Quotes

Saying I don't take my meds because they make me feel funny. Is like cannibals...

Saying I don't take my meds because they make me feel funny. Is like cannibals...

I just dropped my laptop off the boat....It's a Dell, rolling in the deep.

I just dropped my laptop off the boat....It's a Dell, rolling in the deep.

Have you ever had a fly or small bug land on your computer screen and...

Have you ever had a fly or small bug land on your computer screen and...

I dont mind ketchup on my hot dog, as long as the bun is tight.

I dont mind ketchup on my hot dog, as long as the bun is tight.

It's a recipe for disaster when your country has an obesity epidemic and a skinny...

It's a recipe for disaster when your country has an obesity epidemic and a skinny...

Facebook should make it to where it says, 'Went from being in a relationship' to...

Facebook should make it to where it says, 'Went from being in a relationship' to...

You want to know someone who is amazing, beautiful and has the cutest smile ever?...

You want to know someone who is amazing, beautiful and has the cutest smile ever?...

Spent the entire night trying to create a website for women drivers, but it kept...

Spent the entire night trying to create a website for women drivers, but it kept...

My 'check engine' light came on while driving to work this morning. I looked and...

My 'check engine' light came on while driving to work this morning. I looked and...

To men, women are just city buses. There's another one every five minutes.

To men, women are just city buses. There's another one every five minutes.

When girls hack a friends Facebook account: 'I love you b*tch!' When boys hack a...

When girls hack a friends Facebook account: 'I love you b*tch!' When boys hack a...

Better late than never, but never late is better.

Better late than never, but never late is better.

I feel like getting something done today, so Im just going to sit here until...

I feel like getting something done today, so Im just going to sit here until...

Why do banks lock their pens to the desk? If i'm trusting you with my...

Why do banks lock their pens to the desk? If i'm trusting you with my...

I'm not clumsy. It's just the floor hates me, the tables and chairs are bullies...

I'm not clumsy. It's just the floor hates me, the tables and chairs are bullies...

I used to be good at sports. Then I realized that I could buy trophies....

I used to be good at sports. Then I realized that I could buy trophies....

Never on schedule, but always on time.

Never on schedule, but always on time.