Quotes by Family Guy

Hey, Mother! I come bearing a gift. Ill give you a hint: its in my...

#Family Guy

And Joe, Ive had new neighbors before, but none of them were half the man...

#Family Guy

Dear diary: Jackpot. -Glen Quagmire

#Family Guy

Theres always been a lot of tension between Lois and me, and its not so...

#Family Guy

I will not stand idly by while you abrogate my plans! You shall rue this...

#Family Guy

You know, I rather like this God fellow. Hes very theatrical. A little pestilence here,...

#Family Guy

Dear McGyver: Enclosed is a paper clip, a rubber band, and a drinking straw. Please...

#Family Guy

I want pancakes! God, do you people understand every language except English? Yo quiero pancakes!...

#Family Guy

Ive sprouted another finger. Counting the one from yesterday, Im up to 11. -Baby Stewie

#Family Guy

All right, all right, make like Siamese twins and split... And then one of you...

#Family Guy

I think the lesson here is, it really doesnt matter where youre from, as long...

#Family Guy

Im so hungry I could ride a horse. I dont get it. Well, I could...

#Family Guy