Quotes by Dwight Schrute

Security in this office park is a joke. Last year I came to work with...

#Dwight Schrute

I grew up on a farm. I have seen animals having sex in every position...

#Dwight Schrute

The problem, Jim, is that people who are really suffering from a medical condition wont...

#Dwight Schrute

I am fast. To give you a reference point I am somewhere between a snake...

#Dwight Schrute

How would I describe myself? Three words: hard working, alpha male, jackhammermercilessinsatiable

#Dwight Schrute

Would I ever leave this company? Look, Im all about loyalty. In fact, I feel...

#Dwight Schrute

I train my major blood vessels to retract into my body on command. Also, I...

#Dwight Schrute

There are 40 rules all Schrute boys must learn by age 5. Rule 17- There...

#Dwight Schrute

As a farmer I know that when an animal is sick sometimes the right thing...

#Dwight Schrute

He was already dead, and we Schrutes use every part of the goose. The meat...

#Dwight Schrute

I like the people that I work with, generally. With four exceptions. And I did...

#Dwight Schrute

Why tip someone for a job Im capable of doing myself? I can deliver food....

#Dwight Schrute