Anoint, v.: To grease a king or other great functionary already sufficiently slippery.

Quote by Ambrose Bierce

Topics: Ambrose Bierce Quotes

To apologize is to lay the foundation for a future offense.

To apologize is to lay the foundation for a future offense.

All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.

All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.

MONARCHICAL GOVERNMENT, n. Government.

MONARCHICAL GOVERNMENT, n. Government.

Meekness: Uncommon patience in planning a revenge that is worth while.

Meekness: Uncommon patience in planning a revenge that is worth while.

Infidel: In New York, one who does not believe in the Christian religion; in Constantinople,...

Infidel: In New York, one who does not believe in the Christian religion; in Constantinople,...

It was one of those perfect English autumnal days which occur more frequently in memory...

It was one of those perfect English autumnal days which occur more frequently in memory...

Turkey: A large bird whose flesh, when eaten on certain religious anniversaries has the peculiar...

Turkey: A large bird whose flesh, when eaten on certain religious anniversaries has the peculiar...

Present, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of...

Present, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of...

History is an account mostly false, of events mostly unimportant, which are brought about by...

History is an account mostly false, of events mostly unimportant, which are brought about by...

OLD, adj. In that stage of usefulness which is not inconsistent with general inefficiency, as...

OLD, adj. In that stage of usefulness which is not inconsistent with general inefficiency, as...

LAOCOON, n. A famous piece of antique scripture representing a priest of that name and...

LAOCOON, n. A famous piece of antique scripture representing a priest of that name and...

Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.

Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.

Destiny: A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excuse for failure.

Destiny: A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excuse for failure.

COMMERCE, n. A kind of transaction in which A plunders from B the goods of...

COMMERCE, n. A kind of transaction in which A plunders from B the goods of...

Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.

Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.

Academe, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Academy, n.: A modern...

Academe, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Academy, n.: A modern...

Land: A part of the earth's surface, considered as property. The theory that land is...

Land: A part of the earth's surface, considered as property. The theory that land is...

Aldo Leopold, the early 20th century's Henry David Thoreau, said that we should think like...

Aldo Leopold, the early 20th century's Henry David Thoreau, said that we should think like...

Men no longer love the soil. Landowners sell it, lease it, divide it into shares,...

Men no longer love the soil. Landowners sell it, lease it, divide it into shares,...

Those who contemplate the beauty of the earth find resources of strength that will endure...

Those who contemplate the beauty of the earth find resources of strength that will endure...