When I text someone and they dont text me back, I automatically assume that they probably fainted from excitement.

Topics: Facebook Status Quotes

Daydreaming while you're reading, then having to re-read what you just read.

Daydreaming while you're reading, then having to re-read what you just read.

Lifes like a bird, its pretty cute until it dumps on your head.

Lifes like a bird, its pretty cute until it dumps on your head.

That moment when you are trapped in the corner of your shower because the cold...

That moment when you are trapped in the corner of your shower because the cold...

Ever notice when your eating cereal, the back of the box suddenly becomes super interesting?

Ever notice when your eating cereal, the back of the box suddenly becomes super interesting?

When people ask me why I don't have any tattoos I ask them 'Would you...

When people ask me why I don't have any tattoos I ask them 'Would you...

Me: 'I wanna go on a diet.' Food: 'LOL! No...'

Me: 'I wanna go on a diet.' Food: 'LOL! No...'

I'm not afraid of heights, deep water, or love. I'm afraid of falling, drowning, and...

I'm not afraid of heights, deep water, or love. I'm afraid of falling, drowning, and...

The awkward when you read the word 'moment' yet it wasn't even there.

The awkward when you read the word 'moment' yet it wasn't even there.

Something is wrong with our government when I see people using food stamps and an...

Something is wrong with our government when I see people using food stamps and an...

That awkward moment when your parents ask if you like anyone.

That awkward moment when your parents ask if you like anyone.

Single, taken, in a relationship; are all just terms. Your status is measured by your...

Single, taken, in a relationship; are all just terms. Your status is measured by your...

I want a relationship. A real, pure, loving, honest relationship. I'm not lonely or desperate,...

I want a relationship. A real, pure, loving, honest relationship. I'm not lonely or desperate,...

Some people might as well post 'Wants Attention' as their Facebook status.

Some people might as well post 'Wants Attention' as their Facebook status.

That awkward moment when you don't want to come out of your room because there...

That awkward moment when you don't want to come out of your room because there...

Nothing is scarier than having 5 missed calls from your mom.

Nothing is scarier than having 5 missed calls from your mom.

Dear boys, If you don't look like Calvin Klein models, don't expect us to look...

Dear boys, If you don't look like Calvin Klein models, don't expect us to look...

Having 20 girlfriends isn't swag...having 1 girlfriend and 19 girls chasing you is.

Having 20 girlfriends isn't swag...having 1 girlfriend and 19 girls chasing you is.