The ball retriever is not long enough to get my putter out of the tree.

Quote by Brian Weis

Topics: Funny Quotes, Golf Quotes

The Internet: Transforming Society and Shaping the Future Through Chat

The Internet: Transforming Society and Shaping the Future Through Chat

But probably every age gets, within certain limits, the science it deserves.

But probably every age gets, within certain limits, the science it deserves.

Mr. Right's coming.. but he's in Africa and he's walking!

Mr. Right's coming.. but he's in Africa and he's walking!

A woman's appetite is twice that of a man's; her sexual desire, four times; her...

A woman's appetite is twice that of a man's; her sexual desire, four times; her...

Competitive golf is played mainly on a five-and-a-half-inch course...the space between your ears.

Competitive golf is played mainly on a five-and-a-half-inch course...the space between your ears.

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone...

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone...

Black and Mexican jokes are all the same. Once you've heard Juan, you've heard Jamal.

Black and Mexican jokes are all the same. Once you've heard Juan, you've heard Jamal.

Actually, the only time I ever took out a one-iron was to kill a tarantula....

Actually, the only time I ever took out a one-iron was to kill a tarantula....

The Olympic Spirit is neither the property of one race nor of one age.

The Olympic Spirit is neither the property of one race nor of one age.

The world is full of willing people; some willing to work, the rest willing to...

The world is full of willing people; some willing to work, the rest willing to...

Please, dear God, don't let me fuck up.

Please, dear God, don't let me fuck up.

I quit flying years ago. I don't want to die with tourists.

I quit flying years ago. I don't want to die with tourists.

Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going...

Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going...

I was always too mature for my age - and not very happy. I had...

I was always too mature for my age - and not very happy. I had...

If opinions are like assholes, then a lot of opinions wear Ed Hardy shirts.

If opinions are like assholes, then a lot of opinions wear Ed Hardy shirts.

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.

When its a question of money, everybody is of the same religion.

When its a question of money, everybody is of the same religion.

Television is to news what bumper stickers are to philosophy.

Television is to news what bumper stickers are to philosophy.

The golf links lie so near the mill, That almost every day, The laboring children...

The golf links lie so near the mill, That almost every day, The laboring children...

If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a...

If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a...