Objects can be classified scientifically into three major categories: those that don't work, those that break down and those that get lost.

Quote by Russell Baker

Topics: Russell Baker Quotes

The only thing I was fit for was to be a writer, and this notion...

The only thing I was fit for was to be a writer, and this notion...

An educated person is one who has learned that information almost always turns out to...

An educated person is one who has learned that information almost always turns out to...

Reporters thrive on the world's misfortune. For this reason they often take an indecent pleasure...

Reporters thrive on the world's misfortune. For this reason they often take an indecent pleasure...

I gave up on new poetry myself 30 years ago when most of it began...

I gave up on new poetry myself 30 years ago when most of it began...

Live by publicity, you'll probably die by publicity.

Live by publicity, you'll probably die by publicity.

Inanimate objects can be classified scientifically into three major categories; those that don't work, those...

Inanimate objects can be classified scientifically into three major categories; those that don't work, those...

The goal of all inanimate objects is to resist man and ultimately defeat him.

The goal of all inanimate objects is to resist man and ultimately defeat him.

People seem to enjoy things more when they know a lot of other people have...

People seem to enjoy things more when they know a lot of other people have...

Usually, terrible things that are done with the excuse that progress requires them are not...

Usually, terrible things that are done with the excuse that progress requires them are not...

Poetry is so vital to us until school spoils it.

Poetry is so vital to us until school spoils it.

Don't try to make children grow up to be like you, or they may do...

Don't try to make children grow up to be like you, or they may do...

People who say you're just as old as you feel are all wrong, fortunately.

People who say you're just as old as you feel are all wrong, fortunately.

Children rarely want to know who their parents were before they were parents, and when...

Children rarely want to know who their parents were before they were parents, and when...

Live by publicity, you'll probably die by publicity.

Live by publicity, you'll probably die by publicity.

When it comes to cars, only two varieties of people are possible - cowards and...

When it comes to cars, only two varieties of people are possible - cowards and...

It seems to be a law in American life that whatever enriches us anywhere except...

It seems to be a law in American life that whatever enriches us anywhere except...

The worst thing about being a tourist is having other tourists recognize you as a...

The worst thing about being a tourist is having other tourists recognize you as a...

Anticipating that most poetry will be worse than carrying heavy luggage through O'Hare Airport, the...

Anticipating that most poetry will be worse than carrying heavy luggage through O'Hare Airport, the...

What the New Yorker calls home would seem like a couple of closets to most...

What the New Yorker calls home would seem like a couple of closets to most...

Misery no longer loves company. Nowadays it insists on it.

Misery no longer loves company. Nowadays it insists on it.