I wish my microwave had a 'stealth mode' so the people I'm living with don't know I'm having a midnight snack.

Topics: Food Quotes, Funny Quotes

A vegetarian is a person who won't eat anything that can have children.

A vegetarian is a person who won't eat anything that can have children.

Your words are my food, your breath my wine. You are everything to me.

Your words are my food, your breath my wine. You are everything to me.

There is no sincerer love than the love of food.

There is no sincerer love than the love of food.

Is she fat? Her favorite food is seconds

Is she fat? Her favorite food is seconds

The best way to lose weight is to close your mouth - something very difficult...

The best way to lose weight is to close your mouth - something very difficult...

The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came...

The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came...

Frankly, once I've eaten a thing... I don't expect to see it again.

Frankly, once I've eaten a thing... I don't expect to see it again.

There is no such thing as a free lunch

There is no such thing as a free lunch

100 calorie packs aren't so bad if you have 3 or 4 of them.

100 calorie packs aren't so bad if you have 3 or 4 of them.

You eat, in dreams, the custard of the day.

You eat, in dreams, the custard of the day.

It is the food which you furnish to your mind that determines the whole character...

It is the food which you furnish to your mind that determines the whole character...

Strength is the ability to break a chocolate bar into four pieces with your bare...

Strength is the ability to break a chocolate bar into four pieces with your bare...

Must is a hard nut to crack, but it has a sweet kernel.

Must is a hard nut to crack, but it has a sweet kernel.

The food here is terrible, and the portions are too small.

The food here is terrible, and the portions are too small.

Wit is the salt of conversation, not the food.

Wit is the salt of conversation, not the food.

If you're going to America, bring your own food.

If you're going to America, bring your own food.

Heres something to think about: How come you never see a headline like Psychic Wins...

Heres something to think about: How come you never see a headline like Psychic Wins...

If people let government decide what foods they eat and what medicines they take, their...

If people let government decide what foods they eat and what medicines they take, their...

Nothing makes me want a relationship to fail more than matching profile pictures.

You don't know a women till you've met her in court.

You don't know a women till you've met her in court.