I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the sap

Quote by Fred Allen

Topics: Family Quotes

I play a musical instrument a little, but only for my own amazement.

I play a musical instrument a little, but only for my own amazement.

Television is the triumph of machine over people.

Television is the triumph of machine over people.

Television is called a medium because anything good on it is rare

Television is called a medium because anything good on it is rare

You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood and place it in the navel of...

You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood and place it in the navel of...

California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange.

California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange.

What's on your mind, if you will allow the overstatement?

What's on your mind, if you will allow the overstatement?

Television is a medium because anything well done is rare.

Television is a medium because anything well done is rare.

You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood and place it in the navel of...

You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood and place it in the navel of...

You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a...

You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a...

Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and...

Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and...

Treat employees like partners, and they act like partners.

Treat employees like partners, and they act like partners.

The first time I sang in the church choir; two hundred people changed their religion.

The first time I sang in the church choir; two hundred people changed their religion.

A telescope will magnify a star a thousand times, but a good press agent can...

A telescope will magnify a star a thousand times, but a good press agent can...

An advertising agency is 85 percent confusion and 15 percent commission.

An advertising agency is 85 percent confusion and 15 percent commission.

Advertising is 85% confusion and 15% commission

Advertising is 85% confusion and 15% commission

I have just returned from Boston. It is the only sane thing to do if...

I have just returned from Boston. It is the only sane thing to do if...

The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on...

The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on...

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

After a day spent staring at a computer monitor, think of (a) book as a...

After a day spent staring at a computer monitor, think of (a) book as a...

I couldn't wait for success, so I went ahead without it.

I couldn't wait for success, so I went ahead without it.