Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you're in.

Quote by Richard Jeni

Topics: Fake Girls Quotes

I think that's how Chicago got started. A bunch of people in New York said,...

I think that's how Chicago got started. A bunch of people in New York said,...

Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you're in.

Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you're in.

It is a sad fact that 50 percent of marriages in this country end in...

It is a sad fact that 50 percent of marriages in this country end in...

The sumptuous age of stars and images is reduced to a few artificial tornado effects,...

The sumptuous age of stars and images is reduced to a few artificial tornado effects,...

A genius can't be forced; nor can you make an ape an alderman.

A genius can't be forced; nor can you make an ape an alderman.

Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.

Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.

Here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is finished: If you're...

Here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is finished: If you're...

Andy: Look at our love fern! It's dead! Ben: No it's only sleeping.

Andy: Look at our love fern! It's dead! Ben: No it's only sleeping.

I don't feel old. I don't feel anything till noon. That's when it's time for...

I don't feel old. I don't feel anything till noon. That's when it's time for...

One hour of right-down love is worth an age of dully living on.

One hour of right-down love is worth an age of dully living on.

God don't make no mistakes. That's how He got to be God.

God don't make no mistakes. That's how He got to be God.

I am the big sister which makes me the boss!

I am the big sister which makes me the boss!

Sisters never quite forgive each other for what happened when they were five.

Sisters never quite forgive each other for what happened when they were five.

You can't legislate intelligence and common sense into people

You can't legislate intelligence and common sense into people

Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

I am kind of paranoid in reverse. I suspect people of plotting to make me...

I am kind of paranoid in reverse. I suspect people of plotting to make me...

Mr. Right's coming.. but he's in Africa and he's walking!

Mr. Right's coming.. but he's in Africa and he's walking!

Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never...

Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never...

Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in...

Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in...

Twas a woman who drove me to drink. I never had the courtesy to thank...

Twas a woman who drove me to drink. I never had the courtesy to thank...

Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.

Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.