God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny.

Quote by Garrison Keillor

Topics: Comedy Quotes, God Quotes

I'm not busy... a woman with three children under the age of 10 wouldn't think...

I'm not busy... a woman with three children under the age of 10 wouldn't think...

You taught me to be nice, so nice that now I am so full of...

You taught me to be nice, so nice that now I am so full of...

It was luxuries like air conditioning that brought down the Roman Empire. With air conditioning...

It was luxuries like air conditioning that brought down the Roman Empire. With air conditioning...

Where all the women are strong, all the men are good-looking and all the children...

Where all the women are strong, all the men are good-looking and all the children...

I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it.

I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it.

They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad...

They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad...

A girl in a bikini is like having a loaded pistol on your coffee table...

A girl in a bikini is like having a loaded pistol on your coffee table...

A book is a gift you can open again and again.

A book is a gift you can open again and again.

That's the news from Lake Wobegon, where all the women are strong, all the men...

That's the news from Lake Wobegon, where all the women are strong, all the men...

It (The New York Times) reads like it was edited by two elderly sociologists, one...

It (The New York Times) reads like it was edited by two elderly sociologists, one...

God writes a lot of comedy-the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors...

God writes a lot of comedy-the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors...

Welcome to Lake Wobegon, where all the women are strong, all the men are good-looking,...

Welcome to Lake Wobegon, where all the women are strong, all the men are good-looking,...

It was luxuries like air conditioning that brought down the Roman Empire. With air conditioning...

It was luxuries like air conditioning that brought down the Roman Empire. With air conditioning...

They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad...

They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad...

Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function

Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function

Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a purpose.

Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a purpose.

God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad...

God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad...

Why don't you climb down off the cross, take the wood to build a bridge,...

Why don't you climb down off the cross, take the wood to build a bridge,...

I'll show you politics in America. Here it is, right here. 'I think the puppet...

I'll show you politics in America. Here it is, right here. 'I think the puppet...

When Communist U.S.S.R. was a superpower, the world was better off. The right-wing media is...

When Communist U.S.S.R. was a superpower, the world was better off. The right-wing media is...

And they that know thy name will put their trust in thee: for thou, Lord,...

And they that know thy name will put their trust in thee: for thou, Lord,...