Dont clap Im not a jazz band for Christs sake.

Quote by Dylan Moran

Topics: Applause Quotes, Jazz Quotes

I don't really think of myself as an actor.

I don't really think of myself as an actor.

If I hadn't done this I might have ended up digging the roads.

If I hadn't done this I might have ended up digging the roads.

Yeah, I think Michael has had to deal with that label of being Michael Caine...

Yeah, I think Michael has had to deal with that label of being Michael Caine...

You achieve the surreal jokes through the realism by making it elastic.

You achieve the surreal jokes through the realism by making it elastic.

Money can't buy you love, but it can get you some really good chocolate ginger...

Money can't buy you love, but it can get you some really good chocolate ginger...

One thing that's coming up a lot is: are you as grumpy as you appear...

One thing that's coming up a lot is: are you as grumpy as you appear...

You try various things when you're growing up. I was an attache in the Foreign...

You try various things when you're growing up. I was an attache in the Foreign...

The characters can't be wittier than people are in real life. They have to be...

The characters can't be wittier than people are in real life. They have to be...

I don't want to do the same thing over and over again.

I don't want to do the same thing over and over again.

Red meat is not bad for you

Red meat is not bad for you

I can't swim. I can't drive, either. I was going to learn to drive but...

I can't swim. I can't drive, either. I was going to learn to drive but...

I have a very low level of recognition, which is fine by me.

I have a very low level of recognition, which is fine by me.

I thought The Office was good, though I didn't think of it as a sitcom,...

I thought The Office was good, though I didn't think of it as a sitcom,...

The truth is that I'm constitutionally incapable of doing an ordinary job.

The truth is that I'm constitutionally incapable of doing an ordinary job.

I can't swim. I can't drive, either. I was going to learn to drive but...

I can't swim. I can't drive, either. I was going to learn to drive but...

Showing off seemed to me to be a highly valuable and necessary activity when I...

Showing off seemed to me to be a highly valuable and necessary activity when I...

I have no qualifications to do anything else and there weren't any formal application forms...

I have no qualifications to do anything else and there weren't any formal application forms...

I think a lot of the time you just parody yourself.

I think a lot of the time you just parody yourself.

The trend now is to get away from stage bound sitcoms.

The trend now is to get away from stage bound sitcoms.

In the same way, there is some creature gnawing away inside of me, urging me...

In the same way, there is some creature gnawing away inside of me, urging me...