Breasts like granite and a brain like swiss cheese.

Quote by Billy Wilder

Topics: Funny Quotes, Putdowns Quotes

If you're going to tell people the truth, be funny or they'll kill you.

If you're going to tell people the truth, be funny or they'll kill you.

Shoot a few scenes out of focus. I want to win the foreign film award.

Shoot a few scenes out of focus. I want to win the foreign film award.

I would rather sleep in a bathroom than in another hotel.

I would rather sleep in a bathroom than in another hotel.

We are on the track of something absolutely mediocre.

We are on the track of something absolutely mediocre.

Trust your own instinct. Your mistakes might as well be your own, instead of someone...

Trust your own instinct. Your mistakes might as well be your own, instead of someone...

It used to be that we in films were the lowest form of art. Now...

It used to be that we in films were the lowest form of art. Now...

An actor entering through the door, you've got nothing. But if he enters through the...

An actor entering through the door, you've got nothing. But if he enters through the...

They've tried to manufacture other Marilyn Monroes and they will undoubtedly keep trying. But it...

They've tried to manufacture other Marilyn Monroes and they will undoubtedly keep trying. But it...

It was hell at the time, but after it was over, it was wonderful.

It was hell at the time, but after it was over, it was wonderful.

Now, what is it which makes a scene interesting? If you see a man coming...

Now, what is it which makes a scene interesting? If you see a man coming...

It used to be that we in films were the lowest form of art. Now...

It used to be that we in films were the lowest form of art. Now...

What critics call dirty in our pictures, they call lusty in foreign films.

What critics call dirty in our pictures, they call lusty in foreign films.

An audience is never wrong. An individual member of it may be an imbecile, but...

An audience is never wrong. An individual member of it may be an imbecile, but...

I'd worship the ground you walked on if only you walked in a better neighborhood.

I'd worship the ground you walked on if only you walked in a better neighborhood.

I'd worship the ground you walked on if only you walked in a better neighborhood.

I'd worship the ground you walked on if only you walked in a better neighborhood.

France is a place where the money falls apart in your hands but you can't...

France is a place where the money falls apart in your hands but you can't...

Happiness is working with Jack Lemmon.

Happiness is working with Jack Lemmon.

Don't be too clever for an audience. Make it obvious. Make the subtleties obvious also.

Don't be too clever for an audience. Make it obvious. Make the subtleties obvious also.

One's too many, and a hundred's not enough.

One's too many, and a hundred's not enough.

If there's anything I hate more than being taken seriously, it's being taken too seriously.

If there's anything I hate more than being taken seriously, it's being taken too seriously.