All we ever do is lie around, take baths together and talk about feelings.

Quote by Samantha Jones

Topics: Samantha Jones Quotes

Hey, you almost masturbated, he almost got it up, together you almost had sex.

Hey, you almost masturbated, he almost got it up, together you almost had sex.

Transexuals. Chicks with d**ks. Boobs on top, balls down below.

Transexuals. Chicks with d**ks. Boobs on top, balls down below.

Well, its tedious and the sex is dwindeling, so from what I've heard, yes!

Well, its tedious and the sex is dwindeling, so from what I've heard, yes!

I don't know how you people do it! All that emotional chow chow, it's exhausting!

I don't know how you people do it! All that emotional chow chow, it's exhausting!

Yes ladies. I am a lesbian.

Yes ladies. I am a lesbian.

Honey, you look back so much you should have a relationship rear-view mirror.

Honey, you look back so much you should have a relationship rear-view mirror.

Last night, I could not stop thinking about a Big Mac. I finally had to...

Last night, I could not stop thinking about a Big Mac. I finally had to...

Hi, my name is Samantha and I am a love-aholic

Hi, my name is Samantha and I am a love-aholic

A guy can just as easily dump you if you fuck him on the first...

A guy can just as easily dump you if you fuck him on the first...

Can we cut the cake? I have a three-way to go to.

Can we cut the cake? I have a three-way to go to.

I'm paying a fortune to live in a neighbouhood that's trendy by day and trannie...

I'm paying a fortune to live in a neighbouhood that's trendy by day and trannie...

The country runs better with a good looking man in the White House. Look what...

The country runs better with a good looking man in the White House. Look what...

I take offense at that generalisation. Not all women sit around and obsess about men,...

I take offense at that generalisation. Not all women sit around and obsess about men,...

Well, I'll admit I have had to polish myself off once or twice, but yes!...

Well, I'll admit I have had to polish myself off once or twice, but yes!...

Be damn sure before you get off the ferris wheel, because there are twenty-two perky...

Be damn sure before you get off the ferris wheel, because there are twenty-two perky...

Oh come on, if you're going to get a vibrator, at least get one called...

Oh come on, if you're going to get a vibrator, at least get one called...

For the last time, the only thing I like about Richard is his big,throbbing, rock...

For the last time, the only thing I like about Richard is his big,throbbing, rock...

Fuck me badly once, shame on you. Fuck me badly twice, shame on me.

Fuck me badly once, shame on you. Fuck me badly twice, shame on me.

Honey, what's the point of being in the suburbs if you're not going to f**k...

Honey, what's the point of being in the suburbs if you're not going to f**k...

I will wear whatever and blow whomever I want as long as I can breathe...

I will wear whatever and blow whomever I want as long as I can breathe...