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When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A...

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When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A...

I was married by a judge,I should asked for a jury

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I was married by a judge,I should asked for a jury

A black cat crossing your path signifies..

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A black cat crossing your path signifies..

Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance.There's no doubt about it.Anytime you have a...

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Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance.There's no doubt about it.Anytime you have a...

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into...

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I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into...

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down, I convulsed...

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From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down, I convulsed...

Humor is reason gone mad.

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Humor is reason gone mad.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on...

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The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on...

Ever notice how 'What the hell' is always the right answer?

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Ever notice how 'What the hell' is always the right answer?

Remember, we're madly in love, so it's all right to kiss me anytime you feel...

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Remember, we're madly in love, so it's all right to kiss me anytime you feel...

A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to...

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A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to...

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four people is suffering from...

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The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four people is suffering from...

“The Guide says there is an art to flying", said Ford, "or rather a knack....

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“The Guide says there is an art to flying

I love mankind, it's people I can't stand

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I love mankind, it's people I can't stand

So many books, so little time.

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So many books, so little time.

The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I...

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The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I...

Some people say, “Never let them see you cry.” I say, if you’re so mad...

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Some people say, “Never let them see you cry.” I say, if you’re so mad...

Life's hard. It's even harder when you're stupid.

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Life's hard. It's even harder when you're stupid.

Creativity is knowing how to hide your sources

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Creativity is knowing how to hide your sources

I do not want people to be very agreeable, as it saves me the trouble...

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I do not want people to be very agreeable, as it saves me the trouble...

I don't believe in science. I trust science. Science works, whether I believe in it...

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I don't believe in science. I trust science. Science works, whether I believe in it...