Objects can be classified scientifically into three major categories: those that don't work, those that break down and those that get lost.

Quote by Russell Baker

Topics: Russell Baker Quotes

Inanimate objects can be classified scientifically into three major categories; those that don't work, those...

Inanimate objects can be classified scientifically into three major categories; those that don't work, those...

The goal of all inanimate objects is to resist man and ultimately defeat him.

The goal of all inanimate objects is to resist man and ultimately defeat him.

Reporters thrive on the world's misfortune. For this reason they often take an indecent pleasure...

Reporters thrive on the world's misfortune. For this reason they often take an indecent pleasure...

People who say you're just as old as you feel are all wrong, fortunately.

People who say you're just as old as you feel are all wrong, fortunately.

A group of politicians deciding to dump a President because his morals are bad is...

A group of politicians deciding to dump a President because his morals are bad is...

It seems to be a law in American life that whatever enriches us anywhere except...

It seems to be a law in American life that whatever enriches us anywhere except...

Don't try to make children grow up to be like you, or they may do...

Don't try to make children grow up to be like you, or they may do...

Live by publicity, you'll probably die by publicity.

Live by publicity, you'll probably die by publicity.

Live by publicity, you'll probably die by publicity.

Live by publicity, you'll probably die by publicity.

In America, it is sport that is the opiate of the masses.

In America, it is sport that is the opiate of the masses.

Ah, summer, what power you have to make us suffer and like it.

Ah, summer, what power you have to make us suffer and like it.

People seem to enjoy things more when they know a lot of other people have...

People seem to enjoy things more when they know a lot of other people have...

Situation comedy on television has thrived for years on canned laughter grafted by gaglines by...

Situation comedy on television has thrived for years on canned laughter grafted by gaglines by...

A group of politicians deciding to dump a President because his morals are bad is...

A group of politicians deciding to dump a President because his morals are bad is...

The goal of all inanimate objects is to resist man and ultimately defeat him.

The goal of all inanimate objects is to resist man and ultimately defeat him.

I gave up on new poetry myself 30 years ago when most of it began...

I gave up on new poetry myself 30 years ago when most of it began...

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say that what we really...

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say that what we really...

Misery no longer loves company. Nowadays it insists on it.

Misery no longer loves company. Nowadays it insists on it.

Children rarely want to know who their parents were before they were parents, and when...

Children rarely want to know who their parents were before they were parents, and when...

In America nothing dies easier than tradition.

In America nothing dies easier than tradition.