My bed is a time machine. I lay down for 5 minutes and the next thing I know, its 5 hours later...

Topics: Humor Quotes, Relation Quotes, Sleep Quotes, Time Quotes

I mean, yeah, I'm sure that Python and the other things have paved the way...

I mean, yeah, I'm sure that Python and the other things have paved the way...

I have never yet figured out what to do about good advice that you get,...

I have never yet figured out what to do about good advice that you get,...

See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only...

See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only...

Is the chemical aftertaste the reason why people eat hot dogs, or is it some...

Is the chemical aftertaste the reason why people eat hot dogs, or is it some...

Humor is an affirmation of dignity, a declaration of mans superiority to all that befalls...

Humor is an affirmation of dignity, a declaration of mans superiority to all that befalls...

Bad humor is an evasion of reality; good humor is an acceptance of it.

Bad humor is an evasion of reality; good humor is an acceptance of it.

I heard you're good in algebra, can you replace my 'X' without asking 'Y?'

I heard you're good in algebra, can you replace my 'X' without asking 'Y?'

I don't think I could ever do a network sitcom because the humor is often...

I don't think I could ever do a network sitcom because the humor is often...

Does anyone here work in advertising or marketing? Well if you do, when you get...

Does anyone here work in advertising or marketing? Well if you do, when you get...

Rock Hudson wasn't my type. He's a great guy and had a great sense of...

Rock Hudson wasn't my type. He's a great guy and had a great sense of...

God had a sense of humor, a style of his own.

God had a sense of humor, a style of his own.

Lesbian humor isn't trying to sell anything, it doesn't have to sell out. Coming out...

Lesbian humor isn't trying to sell anything, it doesn't have to sell out. Coming out...

Humor is, I think, the subtlest and chanciest of literary forms. It is surely not...

Humor is, I think, the subtlest and chanciest of literary forms. It is surely not...

From the ages of 8-18, me and my family moved around a lot. Mostly we...

From the ages of 8-18, me and my family moved around a lot. Mostly we...

I've got a great sense of humor. Anthony Hopkins

I've got a great sense of humor. Anthony Hopkins

The kind of humor I like is the thing that makes me laugh for five...

The kind of humor I like is the thing that makes me laugh for five...

If you can get humor and seriousness at the same time, you've created a special...

If you can get humor and seriousness at the same time, you've created a special...

A great step towards independence is good humored stomach

A great step towards independence is good humored stomach

Suffering the hot side of the pillow while the cold side charges, the worst.

Suffering the hot side of the pillow while the cold side charges, the worst.

Take rest; a field that has rested gives a bountiful crop.

Take rest; a field that has rested gives a bountiful crop.

Time will bring to light whatever is hidden; it will cover up and conceal what...

Time will bring to light whatever is hidden; it will cover up and conceal what...