You know I've got a chum, a smashing mate, he's got a dog with no legs, and he calls it a cigarette. It's true, yeah, because at nighttime he has to take it out for a drag.

Quote by Norman Wisdom

Topics: Norman Wisdom Quotes

I was born in very sorry circumstances.

I was born in very sorry circumstances.

I do play drums when I'm on tour.

I do play drums when I'm on tour.

All my boyhood, all I ever wanted was to be loved.

All my boyhood, all I ever wanted was to be loved.

I've an idea for doing a Situation Comedy myself but its always difficult to get...

I've an idea for doing a Situation Comedy myself but its always difficult to get...

I've been extremely lucky having been in the army when I was a boy of...

I've been extremely lucky having been in the army when I was a boy of...

I like consistency. If you've had a childhood like mine, you want some things you...

I like consistency. If you've had a childhood like mine, you want some things you...

At my age, the radiation will probably do me good.

At my age, the radiation will probably do me good.

I used to first go on to entertain an audience. But now I go, and...

I used to first go on to entertain an audience. But now I go, and...

I was born in London, and went to school in Scotland - I used to...

I was born in London, and went to school in Scotland - I used to...

I've always had a sense of humour, and I still do, so I just want...

I've always had a sense of humour, and I still do, so I just want...

Such is life and life is such and after all it isn't much. First a...

Such is life and life is such and after all it isn't much. First a...

In fact, one was so booked out we went from March and were to go...

In fact, one was so booked out we went from March and were to go...

I was in the band as a boy and was taught music and learned to...

I was in the band as a boy and was taught music and learned to...

I play drums, clarinet, saxophone, trumpet, french horn, piano.

I play drums, clarinet, saxophone, trumpet, french horn, piano.

I've done seven shows at the Palladium - long running shows I'm talking about.

I've done seven shows at the Palladium - long running shows I'm talking about.

Of course I've done musicals here in London.

Of course I've done musicals here in London.

I was born in very sorry circumstances. Both of my parents were very sorry.

I was born in very sorry circumstances. Both of my parents were very sorry.

I'm still constantly thinking of ideas. I don't feel 90. I think I'm about 12.

I'm still constantly thinking of ideas. I don't feel 90. I think I'm about 12.

I don't know nothing about communism. But I know the Albanians loved me. Same reason...

I don't know nothing about communism. But I know the Albanians loved me. Same reason...

Well if I was going to describe my audience, it's going to take longer than...

Well if I was going to describe my audience, it's going to take longer than...