With my sunglasses on, I'm Jack Nicholson. Without them, I'm fat and 60.

Quote by Jack Nicholson

Topics: Jack Nicholson Quotes

What's beautiful is all that counts, pal. That's ALL that counts.

What's beautiful is all that counts, pal. That's ALL that counts.

I'm not hard to get along with.

I'm not hard to get along with.

I'm a New Wave baby, so I got very stimulated by foreign film.

I'm a New Wave baby, so I got very stimulated by foreign film.

There's only two people in your life you should lie to... the police and your...

There's only two people in your life you should lie to... the police and your...

I sort of understood that when I first started: that you shouldn't repeat a success....

I sort of understood that when I first started: that you shouldn't repeat a success....

People who speak in metaphors should shampoo my crotch.

People who speak in metaphors should shampoo my crotch.

I'll tell you one thing: Don't ever give anybody your best advice, because they're not...

I'll tell you one thing: Don't ever give anybody your best advice, because they're not...

My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.

My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.

I'm the last guy in the world to feel overlooked by the Academy.

I'm the last guy in the world to feel overlooked by the Academy.

Well, I'm not going to sit here and pretend that I haven't been a rogue...

Well, I'm not going to sit here and pretend that I haven't been a rogue...

I've never been able to say I've been influenced by a list of artists I...

I've never been able to say I've been influenced by a list of artists I...

My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a bitch.

My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a bitch.

There is no way you can get people to believe you on screen if they...

There is no way you can get people to believe you on screen if they...

I used to think that one of the great signs of security was the ability...

I used to think that one of the great signs of security was the ability...

Well, a younger woman is a type, but not necessarily a type for me. And...

Well, a younger woman is a type, but not necessarily a type for me. And...

I only take Viagra when I'm with more than one woman.

I only take Viagra when I'm with more than one woman.

I learned a long time ago in Hollywood that the only person I should vote...

I learned a long time ago in Hollywood that the only person I should vote...

I know I can act. There aren't too many other jobs I know how to...

I know I can act. There aren't too many other jobs I know how to...

Well, a girlfriend once told me never to fight with anybody you don't love.

Well, a girlfriend once told me never to fight with anybody you don't love.

Just let the wardrobe do the acting.

Just let the wardrobe do the acting.