When I propose to my future wife, I'm going to put a ring in a Pokeball, get down on one knee, and say 'I choose you.'

Topics: Funny Marriage Quotes

There is one thing more exasperating than a wife who can cook and won't, and...

There is one thing more exasperating than a wife who can cook and won't, and...

The only reason my wife agreed to marry me is because Christian Bale wasn't around...

The only reason my wife agreed to marry me is because Christian Bale wasn't around...

You could be married and bored or single and lonely. Ain't no happiness nowhere.

You could be married and bored or single and lonely. Ain't no happiness nowhere.

To keep your marriage brimming, With love in the loving cup, Whenever you're wrong, admit...

To keep your marriage brimming, With love in the loving cup, Whenever you're wrong, admit...

My husband and I have never considered divorce...murder sometimes, but never divorce.

My husband and I have never considered divorce...murder sometimes, but never divorce.

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.