Painting: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather and exposing them to the critic.
Quote by Ambrose Bierce
Positive, adj.: Mistaken at the top of one's voice.
The spiritual attitude of a man to a god and a dog to a man.
CUPID, n. The so-called god of love. This bastard creation of a barbarous fancy was...
Education, n.: That which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack...
Age: that period of life in which we compound for the vices that we still...
Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.
When you doubt, abstain.
Politeness, n: The most acceptable hypocrisy.
Ardor, n. The quality that distinguishes love without knowledge.
A man is known by the company he organizes.
Consult: To seek approval for a course of action already decided upon.
Women in love are less ashamed than men. They have less to be ashamed of.
Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.
Compromise, n. Such an adjustment of conflicting interests as gives each adversary the satisfaction of...
Egotism, n: Doing the New York Times crossword puzzle with a pen.
Enthusiasm - a distemper of youth, curable by small doses of repentance in connection with...
Genealogy, n. An account of one's descent from a man who did not particularly care...
Alien - an American sovereign in his probationary state.
Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.