Left hand, right hand, it doesnt matter. Im amphibious.

Quote by Charles Shackleford

Topics: Funny Quotes, Sports Quotes

Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I...

Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I...

Dublin university contains the cream of Ireland: Rich and thick.

Dublin university contains the cream of Ireland: Rich and thick.

The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than...

The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than...

Every murderer is probably somebody's old friend.

Every murderer is probably somebody's old friend.

When youre up to your armpits in alligators, its hard to remember to drain the...

When youre up to your armpits in alligators, its hard to remember to drain the...

If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars.

If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars.

Dont complain about the snow on your neighbors roof when your own doorstep is unclean.

Dont complain about the snow on your neighbors roof when your own doorstep is unclean.

The more I look around and listen I realize that I'm not alone. We are...

The more I look around and listen I realize that I'm not alone. We are...

Every time you see a beautiful woman, just remember, somebody got tired of her

Every time you see a beautiful woman, just remember, somebody got tired of her

In the wintertime, in the snow country, citrus fruit was so rare, and if you...

In the wintertime, in the snow country, citrus fruit was so rare, and if you...

Mum comes in and says 'I'm working out,' and she'll just be standing there naked...

Mum comes in and says 'I'm working out,' and she'll just be standing there naked...

Zombies are looking for brains. Don't worry. You're safe.

Zombies are looking for brains. Don't worry. You're safe.

As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I...

As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I...

The embarrassing thing is that the salad dressing is outgrossing my films.

The embarrassing thing is that the salad dressing is outgrossing my films.

In this age of electronic money, investors are no longer seduced by a financial 'dance...

In this age of electronic money, investors are no longer seduced by a financial 'dance...

My favorite review described me as the cinematic equ

My favorite review described me as the cinematic equ

The creator of the universe works in mysterious ways. But he uses a base ten...

The creator of the universe works in mysterious ways. But he uses a base ten...

Casey knew his baseball. He only made it look like he was fooling around. He...

Casey knew his baseball. He only made it look like he was fooling around. He...

If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there'd be a shortage of...

If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there'd be a shortage of...

You are only as good as the coach thinks you are.

You are only as good as the coach thinks you are.