If you were to open up a baby's head - and I am not for a moment suggesting that you should - you would find nothing but an enormous drool gland.

Quote by Dave Barry

Topics: Being A Woman Quotes, Women Quotes

We operate under a jury system in this country, and as much as we complain...

We operate under a jury system in this country, and as much as we complain...

Geographically, Ireland is a medium-sized rural island that is slowly but steadily being consumed by...

Geographically, Ireland is a medium-sized rural island that is slowly but steadily being consumed by...

I find myself having these conversations where I go...You know, the guy, in that place....

I find myself having these conversations where I go...You know, the guy, in that place....

Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant...

Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant...

The primary function of the government is - and here I am quoting directly from...

The primary function of the government is - and here I am quoting directly from...

Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of...

Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of...

People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to...

People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to...

We journalists make it a point to know very little about an extremely wide variety...

We journalists make it a point to know very little about an extremely wide variety...

Eugene is located in western Oregon, approximately 278 billion miles from anything.

Eugene is located in western Oregon, approximately 278 billion miles from anything.

One day soon the Gillette company will announce the development of a razor that, thanks...

One day soon the Gillette company will announce the development of a razor that, thanks...

Sharks are as tough as those football fans who take their shirts off during games...

Sharks are as tough as those football fans who take their shirts off during games...

Entire new continent can emerge from the ocean in the time it takes for a...

Entire new continent can emerge from the ocean in the time it takes for a...

My problem with chess was that all my pieces wanted to end the game as...

My problem with chess was that all my pieces wanted to end the game as...

In fact, just about all the major natural attractions you find in the West- the...

In fact, just about all the major natural attractions you find in the West- the...

We journalists... are also extremely impressed with scientists, and we will, frankly, print just about...

We journalists... are also extremely impressed with scientists, and we will, frankly, print just about...

The world is full of strange phenomena that cannot be explained by the laws of...

The world is full of strange phenomena that cannot be explained by the laws of...

American business long ago gave up on demanding that prospective employees be honest and hardworking....

American business long ago gave up on demanding that prospective employees be honest and hardworking....

Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who...

Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who...

What's wrong with gossip? We all live on it, but we deny it; we're hypocrites

What's wrong with gossip? We all live on it, but we deny it; we're hypocrites

Protect your good image from the eyes of negative viewers, who may look at your...

Protect your good image from the eyes of negative viewers, who may look at your...