If you are young and you drink a great deal it will spoil your health, slow your mind, make you fat - in other words, turn you into an adult.

Quote by P J O'Rourke

Topics: Drink Quotes

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief...

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief...

Never fight an inanimate object.

Never fight an inanimate object.

Because of their size, parents may be difficult to discipline properly.

Because of their size, parents may be difficult to discipline properly.

Newsmen believe that news is a tacitly acknowledged fourth branch of the federal system. This...

Newsmen believe that news is a tacitly acknowledged fourth branch of the federal system. This...

If you are young and you drink a great deal it will spoil your health,...

If you are young and you drink a great deal it will spoil your health,...

A very quiet and tasteful way to be famous is to have a famous relative....

A very quiet and tasteful way to be famous is to have a famous relative....

Children from the age of five to ten should watch more television. Television depicts adults...

Children from the age of five to ten should watch more television. Television depicts adults...

Social Security is a government program with a constituency made up of the old, the...

Social Security is a government program with a constituency made up of the old, the...

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief...

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief...

There is one thing women can never take away from men. We die sooner.

There is one thing women can never take away from men. We die sooner.

I suppose I should get a VCR, but the only thing I like about television...

I suppose I should get a VCR, but the only thing I like about television...

If government were a product, selling it would be illegal.

If government were a product, selling it would be illegal.

The government is huge, stupid, greedy and makes nosy, officious and dangerous intrusions into the...

The government is huge, stupid, greedy and makes nosy, officious and dangerous intrusions into the...

Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would prefer that the government does...

Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would prefer that the government does...

Politicians are wonderful people as long as they stay away from things they don't understand,...

Politicians are wonderful people as long as they stay away from things they don't understand,...

I suppose I should get a VCR, but the only thing I like about television...

I suppose I should get a VCR, but the only thing I like about television...

Never wear anything that panics the cat.

Never wear anything that panics the cat.

An intellectual is someone who has found something more interesting than sex.

An intellectual is someone who has found something more interesting than sex.

35 is a very attractive age. London society is full of women of the very...

35 is a very attractive age. London society is full of women of the very...

Someone introduce me to whoever invented Mornings. I will beat the shit out of them.

Someone introduce me to whoever invented Mornings. I will beat the shit out of them.