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You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.

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You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.

My tastes are simple: I am easily satisfied with the best.

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My tastes are simple: I am easily satisfied with the best.

Think about how stupid the average person is, and then realize that half of'em are...

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Think about how stupid the average person is, and then realize that half of'em are...

Creativity is knowing how to hide your sources

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Creativity is knowing how to hide your sources

Ever notice how 'What the hell' is always the right answer?

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Ever notice how 'What the hell' is always the right answer?

Time is a drug. Too much of it kills you.

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Time is a drug. Too much of it kills you.

Life's hard. It's even harder when you're stupid.

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Life's hard. It's even harder when you're stupid.

Animals are my friends...and I don't eat my friends.

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Animals are my friends...and I don't eat my friends.

I can read in Red, I can read in Blue I can read in pickle...

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I can read in Red, I can read in Blue I can read in pickle...

Death's got an Invisibility Cloak?" Harry interrupted again. "So he can sneak up on people,"...

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Death's got an Invisibility Cloak?

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone...

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Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone...

'I am' is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that...

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'I am' is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that...

Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead

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Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead

Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve...

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Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve...

I suppose I'll have to add the force of gravity to my list of enemies.

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I suppose I'll have to add the force of gravity to my list of enemies.

Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand.

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Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand.

Humor is reason gone mad.

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Humor is reason gone mad.

I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer

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I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer

The only reason for time is so that everything doesn't happen at once.

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The only reason for time is so that everything doesn't happen at once.

I wish it need not have happened in my time," said Frodo. "So do I,"...

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I wish it need not have happened in my time,