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An old man: You're Dr. House, aren't you? House: Oh God, don´t tell we used...

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An old man: You're Dr. House, aren't you? House: Oh God, don´t tell we used...

Marriages don't fail because couples get bored. They fail because while they're dating people pretend...

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Marriages don't fail because couples get bored. They fail because while they're dating people pretend...

Faith that's another word for ignorance, isn't it? I've never understood how people can be...

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Faith that's another word for ignorance, isn't it? I've never understood how people can be...

I cared for eight seconds, then I got distracted.

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I cared for eight seconds, then I got distracted.

Dying people lie too. Wish they'd worked less, been nicer, opened orphanages for kittens. If...

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Dying people lie too. Wish they'd worked less, been nicer, opened orphanages for kittens. If...

Time changes everything. That's what people say, it's not true. Doing things changes things. Not...

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Time changes everything. That's what people say, it's not true. Doing things changes things. Not...

Thing is, hope's for sissies.

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Thing is, hope's for sissies.

Perseverance does not equal worthiness. Next time you want to get my attention, wear something...

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Perseverance does not equal worthiness. Next time you want to get my attention, wear something...

You get married at twenty, you're going to be shocked who you're living with at...

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You get married at twenty, you're going to be shocked who you're living with at...

Twenty year olds fall in and out of love more often than they change their...

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Twenty year olds fall in and out of love more often than they change their...

Everything sucks. Might as well find something to smile about.

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Everything sucks. Might as well find something to smile about.

Bizarre is good! Common has hundreds of explanations. Bizarre has hardly any.

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Bizarre is good! Common has hundreds of explanations. Bizarre has hardly any.

The advantage of being a freak is it makes you stronger

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The advantage of being a freak is it makes you stronger

House: No, I hired you because you look good; it's like having a nice piece...

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House: No, I hired you because you look good; it's like having a nice piece...

House Rules: Love each other Hold your head high Try everything once Laugh a lot...

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House Rules: Love each other Hold your head high Try everything once Laugh a lot...

Gifts allow us to demonstrate exactly how little we know about a person.

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Gifts allow us to demonstrate exactly how little we know about a person.

People get what they get. It has nothing to do with that they deserve

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People get what they get. It has nothing to do with that they deserve

If you could reason with religious people, there would be no religious people.

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If you could reason with religious people, there would be no religious people.

Eve: ...every life matters to god. House: Not to me, not to you. Judging by...

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Eve: ...every life matters to god. House: Not to me, not to you. Judging by...

Never get so busy making a living that you forget to make a life.

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Never get so busy making a living that you forget to make a life.

It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I...

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It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I...

I made me laugh

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I made me laugh