When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself.

Quote by Peter O'Toole

Topics: Funny Quotes, God Quotes

When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized...

When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized...

Whenever the talk turns to age, I say I am 49 plus VAT.

Whenever the talk turns to age, I say I am 49 plus VAT.

You can tell a lot about a fellows character by the way he eats jelly...

You can tell a lot about a fellows character by the way he eats jelly...

There are only three things that can kill a farmer: lightning, rolling over in a...

There are only three things that can kill a farmer: lightning, rolling over in a...

People who practice freedom of expression are terrorizing our grammatical way of life.

People who practice freedom of expression are terrorizing our grammatical way of life.

For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness.

For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness.

In politics, if you want anything said ask a man. If you want anything done,...

In politics, if you want anything said ask a man. If you want anything done,...

I'm back... and you knew I was coming. On my way here I passed a...

I'm back... and you knew I was coming. On my way here I passed a...

I believe that sex is the most beautiful, natural, and wholesome thing that money can...

I believe that sex is the most beautiful, natural, and wholesome thing that money can...

I work until beer oclock.

I work until beer oclock.

My father taught me to work; he did not teach me to love it.

My father taught me to work; he did not teach me to love it.

A good holiday is one spent among people whose notions of time are vaguer than...

A good holiday is one spent among people whose notions of time are vaguer than...

A good rule of thumb is if you've made it to thirty-five and your job...

A good rule of thumb is if you've made it to thirty-five and your job...

We sing and dance, make faces and give flower bouquets, trying to be loved. You...

We sing and dance, make faces and give flower bouquets, trying to be loved. You...

The creator of the universe works in mysterious ways. But he uses a base ten...

The creator of the universe works in mysterious ways. But he uses a base ten...

Brewers enjoy working to make beer as much as drinking beer instead of working .

Brewers enjoy working to make beer as much as drinking beer instead of working .

Hes a guy who gets up at six oclock in the morning regardless of what...

Hes a guy who gets up at six oclock in the morning regardless of what...

Employees make the best dates. You don't have to pick them up and they're always...

Employees make the best dates. You don't have to pick them up and they're always...

I believe that God has planted in every heart the desire to live in freedom.

I believe that God has planted in every heart the desire to live in freedom.

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace; where there is hatred, let me sow...

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace; where there is hatred, let me sow...