Conservative, n: A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal who wishes to replace them with others.

Quote by Ambrose Bierce

Topics: Ambrose Bierce Quotes

Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one's own opinion.

Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one's own opinion.

Opportunity is a favorable occasion for grasping a disappointment.

Opportunity is a favorable occasion for grasping a disappointment.

Marriage is the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress...

Marriage is the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress...

Deliberation, n.: The act of examining one's bread to determine which side it is buttered...

Deliberation, n.: The act of examining one's bread to determine which side it is buttered...

Confidante: One entrusted by A with the secrets of B confided to herself by C.

Confidante: One entrusted by A with the secrets of B confided to herself by C.

Infidel: In New York, one who does not believe in the Christian religion; in Constantinople,...

Infidel: In New York, one who does not believe in the Christian religion; in Constantinople,...

Famous, adj.: Conspicuously miserable.

Famous, adj.: Conspicuously miserable.

Laughter is an interior convulsion, producing a distortion of the features and accompanied by inarticulate...

Laughter is an interior convulsion, producing a distortion of the features and accompanied by inarticulate...

Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities...

Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities...

PATRIOTISM, n. Combustible rubbish read to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his...

PATRIOTISM, n. Combustible rubbish read to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his...

Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public...

Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public...

Admiration, n. Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.

Admiration, n. Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.

Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.

Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.

LOSS, n. Privation of that which we had, or had not. Thus, in the latter...

LOSS, n. Privation of that which we had, or had not. Thus, in the latter...

Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility.

Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility.

To apologize is to lay the foundation for a future offense.

To apologize is to lay the foundation for a future offense.

We submit to the majority because we have to. But we are not compelled to...

We submit to the majority because we have to. But we are not compelled to...

Sabbath - a weekly festival having its origin in the fact that God made the...

Sabbath - a weekly festival having its origin in the fact that God made the...

Bore, n. A person who talks when you wish him to listen.

Bore, n. A person who talks when you wish him to listen.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.