Quotes by Groucho Marx

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.

#Funny Marriage, #Judgement, #Marriage

Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.

#Justice, #Military

My mother loved children - she would have given anything if I had been one.

#Mothers

Marriage is a wonderful institution...but who wants to live in an institution?

#Marriage

Practically everybody in New York has half a mind to write a book -and does

#Groucho Marx

I worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.

#Poverty

Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others.

#Principles

Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows, marriage does

#Politics

Do you mind if I don't smoke ?

#Smoking

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into...

#Television

I read in the newspapers they are going to have 30 minutes of intellectual stuff...

#America And Americans, #Education, #Television

I must say I find television very educational. The minute somebody turns it on, I...

#Television