Women gain weight after marriage. Men gain weight after divorce.

Topics: Divorce Quotes, Marriage Quotes

When people get married because they think it's a long-time love affair, they'll be divorced...

When people get married because they think it's a long-time love affair, they'll be divorced...

I've given my memoirs far more thought than any of my marriages. You can't divorce...

I've given my memoirs far more thought than any of my marriages. You can't divorce...

Ah, yes, divorce ... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals...

Ah, yes, divorce ... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals...

I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house.

I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house.

I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house.

I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house.

When two people decide to get a divorce, it isn't a sign that they don't...

When two people decide to get a divorce, it isn't a sign that they don't...

If a book is really good, it deserves to be read again, and if it's...

If a book is really good, it deserves to be read again, and if it's...

A bachelor is a selfish, undeserving guy who has cheated some woman out of a...

A bachelor is a selfish, undeserving guy who has cheated some woman out of a...

My mother always said don't marry for money, divorce for money.

My mother always said don't marry for money, divorce for money.

The difference between a divorce and a legal separation is that a legal separation gives...

The difference between a divorce and a legal separation is that a legal separation gives...

When two divorced people marry, four people get into bed

When two divorced people marry, four people get into bed

Getting divorced just because you don't love a man is almost as silly as getting...

Getting divorced just because you don't love a man is almost as silly as getting...

American husbands are the best in the world; no other husbands are so generous to...

American husbands are the best in the world; no other husbands are so generous to...

Divorced men are more likely to meet their car payments than their child support obligations.

Divorced men are more likely to meet their car payments than their child support obligations.

Divorce is a game played by lawyers.

Divorce is a game played by lawyers.

Divorce is born of perverted morals and leads to vicious habits

Divorce is born of perverted morals and leads to vicious habits

Getting divorced just because you don't love a man is almost as silly as getting...

Getting divorced just because you don't love a man is almost as silly as getting...

At the very least marriage is a miscarriage of expectation, at its worst a wrenching...

At the very least marriage is a miscarriage of expectation, at its worst a wrenching...

The happiness of many marriages is founded on the old proverb: Suspicion doesn't amount to...

The happiness of many marriages is founded on the old proverb: Suspicion doesn't amount to...

Girlfriends have a come hither look. Wives have a hitherto look.

Girlfriends have a come hither look. Wives have a hitherto look.