Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy, the first question I ask myself is: is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?

Quote by Rita Rudner

Topics: Rita Rudner Quotes

I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced...

I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced...

My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but...

My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but...

The older theory was, marry an older man because they're more mature. But the new...

The older theory was, marry an older man because they're more mature. But the new...

I love to shop after a bad relationship. I don't know. I buy a new...

I love to shop after a bad relationship. I don't know. I buy a new...

The word 'aerobics' came about when the gym instructors got together and said: If we're...

The word 'aerobics' came about when the gym instructors got together and said: If we're...

I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told...

I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told...

They usually have two tellers in my local bank, except when it's very busy, when...

They usually have two tellers in my local bank, except when it's very busy, when...

I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to...

I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to...

Love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to...

Love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to...

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.

Men who tell you they read the Ann Summers catalogue for the articles are lying.

Men who tell you they read the Ann Summers catalogue for the articles are lying.

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

It wasn't that no one asked me to the prom, it was that no one...

It wasn't that no one asked me to the prom, it was that no one...

The closest I ever came to a menage-a-trois was when I dated a schizophrenic.

The closest I ever came to a menage-a-trois was when I dated a schizophrenic.

I don't plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts until my ears...

I don't plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts until my ears...

I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to...

I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to...

A man will go to war, fight and die for his country. But he won't...

A man will go to war, fight and die for his country. But he won't...

My mother buried three husbands - and two of them were only napping.

My mother buried three husbands - and two of them were only napping.

When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was...

When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was...

Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain...

Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain...