I've got 911 on speed dial.

Quote by Doug Coupland

Topics: Doug Coupland Quotes

You wait for fate to bring about the changes in life which you should be...

You wait for fate to bring about the changes in life which you should be...

Good-looking people with strong, fluoridated teeth get things handed to them on platters.

Good-looking people with strong, fluoridated teeth get things handed to them on platters.

If nothing else, we simply get used to being alive.

If nothing else, we simply get used to being alive.

Failure is authentic, and because it's authentic, it's real and genuine, and because of that,...

Failure is authentic, and because it's authentic, it's real and genuine, and because of that,...

The universe hands you opportunities for a while, and if you don't take them, the...

The universe hands you opportunities for a while, and if you don't take them, the...

There's nothing cure or funny or lovable about being cheap. It's a total turn-off.

There's nothing cure or funny or lovable about being cheap. It's a total turn-off.

Feeling unique is no indication of uniqueness.

Feeling unique is no indication of uniqueness.

I have trouble with seafood because it tastes like a dock.

I have trouble with seafood because it tastes like a dock.

Tofu hot dogs are actually scarier than real hot dogs. It's like wanting the worst...

Tofu hot dogs are actually scarier than real hot dogs. It's like wanting the worst...

Human beings are the only animal that thinks they change who they are simply by...

Human beings are the only animal that thinks they change who they are simply by...

A man in a bookstore buys a book on loneliness and every woman in the...

A man in a bookstore buys a book on loneliness and every woman in the...

Once you see someone lose it, you can never look at them the same way...

Once you see someone lose it, you can never look at them the same way...

Lottery tickets are a surtax on desperation.

Lottery tickets are a surtax on desperation.

We want our idols to be dead because it makes death a much less scary...

We want our idols to be dead because it makes death a much less scary...

If someone decides to be a musician now, it means because there is no hope...

If someone decides to be a musician now, it means because there is no hope...

You spend a much larger part of your life being old, not young.

You spend a much larger part of your life being old, not young.

It's difficult to speak with beautiful people. No matter how hard you try to pretend...

It's difficult to speak with beautiful people. No matter how hard you try to pretend...

It's weird when people start sentences with 'frankly' - as if their other sentences don't...

It's weird when people start sentences with 'frankly' - as if their other sentences don't...

The person who needs the other person the least in a relationship is the stronger...

The person who needs the other person the least in a relationship is the stronger...

In our heads we're all about 33 years old.

In our heads we're all about 33 years old.