I went to Montreal. My first gig went very badly. They just weren't laughing at anything. I found out they were a load of Christians, and it was a gig to raise money for a new church roof.

Quote by Allan Carr

Topics: Allan Carr Quotes

A lot of comedians, when they have a bad gig, will blame everything but themselves....

A lot of comedians, when they have a bad gig, will blame everything but themselves....

I like old people falling over, that's what makes me laugh.

I like old people falling over, that's what makes me laugh.

I've met Nicole Kidman, Elton John, loads of people.

I've met Nicole Kidman, Elton John, loads of people.

You should never meet your heroes. Paul Newman... I was so excited about meeting him,...

You should never meet your heroes. Paul Newman... I was so excited about meeting him,...

If you go on stage with the wrong attitude, or something in your performance is...

If you go on stage with the wrong attitude, or something in your performance is...

I haven't really got much get up and go. I can't believe I'm on the...

I haven't really got much get up and go. I can't believe I'm on the...

I was quite pleased that Prince Philip didn't say anything like, I hate queers! He...

I was quite pleased that Prince Philip didn't say anything like, I hate queers! He...

I think over there in Montreal they're a bit hardcore with the old homos. They're...

I think over there in Montreal they're a bit hardcore with the old homos. They're...

I didn't really want to be a comedian.

I didn't really want to be a comedian.

I'm just generally hugely frustrated, I'm a very, very frustrated man. I'm just a ball...

I'm just generally hugely frustrated, I'm a very, very frustrated man. I'm just a ball...

I hate Shakespeare. I think Shakespeare's rubbish.

I hate Shakespeare. I think Shakespeare's rubbish.

I still get excited about meeting celebrities, because I don't think I'm a celebrity myself.

I still get excited about meeting celebrities, because I don't think I'm a celebrity myself.

We had our first meeting yesterday, and we just laughed all the way through, so...

We had our first meeting yesterday, and we just laughed all the way through, so...

It's Charley's Aunt and The Odd Couple rolled into one.

It's Charley's Aunt and The Odd Couple rolled into one.

I'd love to do acting, but it'd definitely have to be comedy. I can't do...

I'd love to do acting, but it'd definitely have to be comedy. I can't do...

I was at college doing performing arts, and just spending all my time mucking about,...

I was at college doing performing arts, and just spending all my time mucking about,...