I have to drink this much to be as unfunny as you.

Quote by Patton Oswalt

Topics: Quotes about Patton Oswalt

Share on:

Similar quotes

I had a romance novel inside me, but I paid three sailors to beat it...

#Patton Oswalt

Yeah, there were a few years in the early nineties where I really began to...

#Patton Oswalt

I mean, all alternative comedy is are comedians that have being doing it for so...

#Patton Oswalt

I think right now is the best time for stand-up, ever. I sincerely do.

#Patton Oswalt

I hate all sidekicks.

#Patton Oswalt

I'm not familiar with the metric system.

#Patton Oswalt

I've hung out in the writer's room a few times, but the fact is we've...

#Patton Oswalt

90% of every art form is garbage - dance and stand-up, painting and music. Focus...

#Patton Oswalt

If you hit a midget on the head with a stick, he turns into 40...

#Patton Oswalt