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Flirting is the gentle art of making a man feel pleased with himself.

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Flirting is the gentle art of making a man feel pleased with himself.

It's called flirting when you are in a relationship but it is called being friendly...

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It's called flirting when you are in a relationship but it is called being friendly...

I don't believe that love comes to those who wait. Today love comes to those...

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I don't believe that love comes to those who wait. Today love comes to those...

My version of flirting is looking at someone I find attractive multiple times and hoping...

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My version of flirting is looking at someone I find attractive multiple times and hoping...

Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours.

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Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours.

Shopping is better than sex. At least if you're not satisfied you can exchange it...

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Shopping is better than sex. At least if you're not satisfied you can exchange it...

I love my computer because my friends live in it

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I love my computer because my friends live in it

You know how they say that you can't live without love? Well oxigen is even...

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You know how they say that you can't live without love? Well oxigen is even...

Dr. Cameron: You want me to tell a man whose wife is about to die...

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Dr. Cameron: You want me to tell a man whose wife is about to die...

Be a good kisser. It might make your wife forget that you never take out...

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Be a good kisser. It might make your wife forget that you never take out...

A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known,...

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A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known,...

I really wanted to buy each of the kids something fabulous. But have you seen...

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I really wanted to buy each of the kids something fabulous. But have you seen...

This woman I met last week says she wants a guy who is "funny and...

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This woman I met last week says she wants a guy who is

When a guy goes to a hooker, he's not paying her for sex, he's paying...

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When a guy goes to a hooker, he's not paying her for sex, he's paying...

When I was little "I'm gonna tell your mom" was the scariest sentence ever

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When I was little

Today is Valentine's Day. Or, as men like to call it, Extortion day.

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Today is Valentine's Day. Or, as men like to call it, Extortion day.

Keep smiling and one day Life will get tired of upsetting you

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Keep smiling and one day Life will get tired of upsetting you

A lie is just a great story that someone ruined with the truth

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A lie is just a great story that someone ruined with the truth

Please don't lie to me, unless you're absolutely sure I'll never find out the truth.

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Please don't lie to me, unless you're absolutely sure I'll never find out the truth.

Some people walk into our lives and leave footprints on our heart, other people walk...

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Some people walk into our lives and leave footprints on our heart, other people walk...

Keep smiling and one day life will get tired of upsetting you.

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Keep smiling and one day life will get tired of upsetting you.

End war feed the poor.

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End war feed the poor.