Witticism. A sharp and clever remark, usually quoted and seldom noted; what the Philistine is pleased to call a joke.

Quote by Ambrose Bierce

Topics: Ambrose Bierce Quotes

I believe we shall come to care about people less and less. The more people...

I believe we shall come to care about people less and less. The more people...

The future is that period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are...

The future is that period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are...

Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.

Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.

Backbite. To speak of a man as you find him when he can't find you.

Backbite. To speak of a man as you find him when he can't find you.

Trial. A formal inquiry designed to prove and put upon record the blameless characters of...

Trial. A formal inquiry designed to prove and put upon record the blameless characters of...

Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as...

Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as...

Anoint, v.: To grease a king or other great functionary already sufficiently slippery.

Anoint, v.: To grease a king or other great functionary already sufficiently slippery.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog

PRESBYTERIAN, n. One who holds the conviction that the government authorities of the Church should...

PRESBYTERIAN, n. One who holds the conviction that the government authorities of the Church should...

It was one of those perfect English autumnal days which occur more frequently in memory...

It was one of those perfect English autumnal days which occur more frequently in memory...

Bigot: One who is obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you do not...

Bigot: One who is obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you do not...

Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or...

Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or...

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored...

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored...

Famous, adj.: Conspicuously miserable.

Famous, adj.: Conspicuously miserable.

Education, n.: That which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack...

Education, n.: That which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack...

Abscond - to move in a mysterious way, commonly with the property of another.

Abscond - to move in a mysterious way, commonly with the property of another.

RASH, adj. Insensible to the value of our advice.

RASH, adj. Insensible to the value of our advice.

A bride is a woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.

A bride is a woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.

In business a reputation for keeping absolutely to the letter and spirit of an agreement,...

In business a reputation for keeping absolutely to the letter and spirit of an agreement,...

Politics is the art of preventing people from sticking their noses in things that are...

Politics is the art of preventing people from sticking their noses in things that are...

Nations have recently been led to borrow billions for war; no nation has ever borrowed...

Nations have recently been led to borrow billions for war; no nation has ever borrowed...

Prior to the passage of the Patriot Act, it was very difficult - often impossible...

Prior to the passage of the Patriot Act, it was very difficult - often impossible...