Painting, n.: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather, and exposing them to the critic.
Quote by Ambrose Bierce
Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public...
I never said all Democrats were saloonkeepers. What I said was that all saloonkeepers are...
MUMMY, n. An ancient Egyptian, formerly in universal use among modern civilized nations as medicine,...
Academe, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Academy, n.: A modern...
Learning, n. The kind of ignorance distinguishing the studious.
SAFETY-CLUTCH, n. A mechanical device acting automatically to prevent the fall of an elevator, or...
Liberty: One of Imagination's most precious possessions.
Bacchus, n.: A convenient deity invented by the ancients as an excuse for getting drunk.
Belladonna, n.: In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example...
Present, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of...
Photograph: a picture painted by the sun without instruction in art.
Famous, adj.: Conspicuously miserable.
Advice is the smallest current coin.
The spiritual attitude of a man to a god and a dog to a man.
Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent.
Dawn: When men of reason go to bed.
Witticism. A sharp and clever remark, usually quoted and seldom noted; what the Philistine is...
COMMERCE, n. A kind of transaction in which A plunders from B the goods of...
Remember that credit is money
If I owe you a pound, I have a problem; but if I owe you...