Jokes are better than war. Even the most aggressive jokes are better than the least aggressive wars. Even the longest jokes are better than the shortest wars.

Quote by George Mikes

Topics: Jokes Quotes

Many Continentals think life is a game; the English think cricket is a game

Many Continentals think life is a game; the English think cricket is a game

Many Continentals think life is a game; the English think cricket is a game.

Many Continentals think life is a game; the English think cricket is a game.

When people say England, they sometimes mean Great Britain, sometimes the United Kingdom, sometimes the...

When people say England, they sometimes mean Great Britain, sometimes the United Kingdom, sometimes the...

The world still consists of two clearly divided groups: the English and the foreigners. One...

The world still consists of two clearly divided groups: the English and the foreigners. One...

An Englishman, even if he is alone, forms an orderly queue of one.

An Englishman, even if he is alone, forms an orderly queue of one.

On the Continent people have good food; in England people have good table manners.

On the Continent people have good food; in England people have good table manners.

In England only uneducated people show off their knowledge; nobody quotes Latin or Greek authors...

In England only uneducated people show off their knowledge; nobody quotes Latin or Greek authors...

The world still consists of two clearly divided groups: the English and the foreigners. One...

The world still consists of two clearly divided groups: the English and the foreigners. One...

The trouble with tea is that originally it was quite a good drink. So a...

The trouble with tea is that originally it was quite a good drink. So a...

Jokes are better than war. Even the most aggressive jokes are better than the least...

Jokes are better than war. Even the most aggressive jokes are better than the least...

Continental people have sex lives; the English have hot-water bottles.

Continental people have sex lives; the English have hot-water bottles.

Responsibility for learning belongs to the student, regardless of age.

Responsibility for learning belongs to the student, regardless of age.

Playing poker in their Quonset hut on Tinian, killing the last hours of the preatomic...

Playing poker in their Quonset hut on Tinian, killing the last hours of the preatomic...

Last night I dreamed I ate a ten-pound marshmallow, and when I woke up the...

Last night I dreamed I ate a ten-pound marshmallow, and when I woke up the...

If ever there is tomorrow when we're not together.. there is something you must always...

If ever there is tomorrow when we're not together.. there is something you must always...

One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries.

One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries.

If you want to make God laugh, tell him your future plans.

If you want to make God laugh, tell him your future plans.

Man reaches the highest point of lovableness at 12 to 17 - to get it...

Man reaches the highest point of lovableness at 12 to 17 - to get it...

When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my...

When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my...

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

Sex isn't the answer. Sex is the question, yes is the answer.

Sex isn't the answer. Sex is the question, yes is the answer.