The less you know, the sounder you sleep.

Topics: Funny Quotes, Knowledge Quotes, Russian Proverbs Quotes, Sleep Quotes

More than Santa Claus, your sister knows when you've been bad and good.

More than Santa Claus, your sister knows when you've been bad and good.

Preparation for old age should begin not later than one's teens. A life which is...

Preparation for old age should begin not later than one's teens. A life which is...

A poet must need be before his own age, to be even with posterity.

A poet must need be before his own age, to be even with posterity.

Once a month the sky falls on my head, I come to, and I see...

Once a month the sky falls on my head, I come to, and I see...

There are three rules for writing a novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.

There are three rules for writing a novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.

I wish women were like hockey...Only twenty minute periods.

I wish women were like hockey...Only twenty minute periods.

Computers will never take the place of books. You can't stand on a floppy disk...

Computers will never take the place of books. You can't stand on a floppy disk...

It goes Christmas, New Year's Eve, Valentine's Day. Is that fair to anyone who's alone?...

It goes Christmas, New Year's Eve, Valentine's Day. Is that fair to anyone who's alone?...

A push up bra is like a bag of chips; you open the bag and...

A push up bra is like a bag of chips; you open the bag and...

I never know what I think about something until I read what I've written on...

I never know what I think about something until I read what I've written on...

Age is like love, it cannot be hid.

Age is like love, it cannot be hid.

When you go after honey with a balloon, the great thing is not to let...

When you go after honey with a balloon, the great thing is not to let...

Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little...

Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little...

Politics is perhaps the only profession for which no preparation is thought necessary.

Politics is perhaps the only profession for which no preparation is thought necessary.

It's hilarious when school textbooks try too hard at being racially diverse. 'Brad, Latisha, Pablo...

It's hilarious when school textbooks try too hard at being racially diverse. 'Brad, Latisha, Pablo...

You're only as good as your last haircut.

You're only as good as your last haircut.

You're fooling yourself if you argue with a fool - others may not know the...

You're fooling yourself if you argue with a fool - others may not know the...

All men are created Equal. Some just have more Splenda.

All men are created Equal. Some just have more Splenda.

Casey knew his baseball. He only made it look like he was fooling around. He...

Casey knew his baseball. He only made it look like he was fooling around. He...

Nothing is new, all is rehash.

Nothing is new, all is rehash.

55% of people yawn within 5 minutes of seeing someone else yawn.

55% of people yawn within 5 minutes of seeing someone else yawn.

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